Lately I've been living in my head so much that I feel like I'm going to explode. So, I've decided to try and do a small daily journal to get out my thoughts and inspirations. Will it make me feel better? Who the hell knows? I'm just gonna do it!I've been struggling with my style and making art that makes me "blissful." Is that the goal of creating? Do I create so that I can be in a state of bliss? How selfish. But, it's also so necessary. I suffer from severe depression and making art is a wonderful meditative process that calms me and soothes me. I get so sick when I'm not creating. I started trying to sell my work a few years back and I've been bouncing around experimenting with different subject matter as I explore what makes me feel most whole and relaxed. You know what got in the way? Worrying about "what would sell." Always wondering what other people wanted to purchase and bring into their homes. It's a lot of pressure! I got away from the point...to create something that makes ME happy. To make something that comes from my SOUL. I've started painting whatever comes to me at the time...bright fusions of color and light. I'm not out to make anything representational...I'm simply playing with paint and color and composition to make something that is pleasing to look at. Sometimes I get insecure and think I have to prove myself by painting things that look realistic. But I've been there and done that. It leaves me feeling stressed out, tired, and empty. But painting abstracts in an intuitive way GIVES me energy. It fills me with joy and purpose. I can't explain why, but I'm just going with it.